So Cute You'll Practically Shit Yourself

[alivemagdolene]

What is it about Hello Kitty that can reduce me to the extremely creepy child I once was? I think Hello Kitty's fairly expressionless stare combined with the fact she has no mouth draws me in like the glare of light to lemming moths. Must... purchase... all... plush... That and she has millions of (almost) equally lovable/purchasable friends. I almost develop Japanophile tendencies with all the aggressive adorableness. While the Sanrio website has a lamentably light amount of plush, I still was able to find two plush toys that flat out told me to purchase them or else. Didn't you know stuffed animals are sentient beings? And that they can communicate through your monitor? Oh, come now, don't be ridiculous! Although plush Hello Kitty as a pirate is tempting (although they should issue a corresponding ninja kitty to appease everyone), the two that really got to me were Pandapple and especially Mashumaro, the latter sending waves of squealing through me like a deflated balloon or an rusty door hinge.

Go on, have a look!





I shall now endeavor to silence my inner child by immediately going back to being sour and moody. Frankly, I think my pop-up Sanrio infatuation has to do with my impending birthday, which will turn me further into a gnarled, bitter, crotchety old hag.

PS: Seriously! That puppet is so fucking cute I'm apoplectic! Jesus!